A History and Reflection on Mothers

 

By Jerome Nathaniel

 

Nothing compares to the love and nurture of a Mother. Some may even argue that the very hope of a child’s ability to succeed and function in society can either be made or broken by the relationship and love he/she shares with their mother.

By no surprise, the power and significance of mothers have persisted since the earliest civilizations. Mother’s Day is said to have its roots in the Roman Empire from a week long festival from March 22 to 28 known as “Hilaria.” When the Roman Empire eventually converted to Christianity, the feast was designated to the fourth Sunday of Lent to celebrate the exemplary Christian mother, the Virgin Mary. Today, “Mothering Sunday” is still celebrated in Europe under the many names of “Refreshment Sunday,” “Pudding Pie Sunday,” “Rose Sunday,” Simnel Sunday” and “Mid-Lent Sunday,” in which the story of the Five Loaves of Bread is read in church.

From the Arab world to the Mediterranean, Mother’s Day is still most celebrated in America. Ever since Abolitionist and poet Julia Ward Howe and Anna Jarvis of West Virginia convinced President Woodrow Wilson to sign a proclamation in May 1914 for the holiday to be celebrated every second Sunday of May, Mother’s Day has become one of the most celebrated holidays in America. In fact, Mother’s Day holds the market record for the most greeting card and flower purchases, long distance calls, and the third highest day for church attendance (only following Easter and Christmas Eve).

Its history is larger than life, but the love of a mother is as simple as an unspoken sentiment of understanding and an expression of affection. Members of the Grace Baptist Church of Christ reflected on the meaning of this very important day to their own lives and relationships.

Bro. De’Andre Banks:

“There are never enough words that could ever convey the appreciation that I have for my first teacher; Ernestine Banks. As I reflect on life’s many lessons I marvel at the infallible perseverance that accentuates her overall characteristics. We never seen situations eye to eye all of the time as there were moments in my life that I thought I would be better without her always in my business. However at the end of the day, I thank God for every heard and unheard prayer that she uttered on my behalf. With that being said, I salute you mommy and will always love you.”

Sis. Rachael Osbourne:

“I am very excited that I will be spending Mother's Day with a very important woman in my life. Mom, you are truly a God fearing, strong, eloquent and intelligent woman that loves both Brian and I unconditionally. I pray that I can just come close to being the Mother that you are to Brian and me to my children someday. I want to say that I love you very much and I am looking forward to celebrating you! Happy Mother's Day to all mothers!”

Bro. Kev Lewis:

“Mother’s Day is a very special day. But to be honest, for me, this will the first time I will actually be looking forward to it. In the past I just looked at it as a routine day to buy flowers, spend a little time and be gone about my business. This year is a lot different for a few reasons.

The first reason is because of the birth of my Son. Now my wife is a mother and I really want her first Mother's Day to be great.

The second reason is because of the passing of my God Mother. She passed this January at the age of 81. She has been there for me my whole life, but at the age of 28 this will be my first Mother's Day without her. I can't help but to wish she was still her, but I am at peace with knowing that she gave her best in taking care of, guiding, protecting and loving me through my whole life.

Last but not least there is my Mother. We don't always see eye to eye but we do have a good relationship. With the new additions in my life I feel that I definitely have to let her know that she’s not forgotten, especially on Mother’s Day.”

Sis. Osbourne

“Mother's Day is a day to recognize our beloved Mothers. My Mother, Sister Webster wore many hats. She was my Father's helpmate; a cook, washer, cleaner, childcare taker, disciplinarian as well as a first teacher for five children. So I want to salute all Mothers this day, especially mine.”

Our Community, Our Justice: Reminder Moments; Transcend the Cubicle

Whenever someone thinks of a noble career that allows you to give back to the community and improve the conditions of society, the non-profit sector is often the first field that comes to mind. Some people may even envision non-profit employees walking down the most impoverished streets in the country to work hands-on with their target populations. But that is merely a half truth. A quick internship with just about any non-profit would acquaint you with the realities of the office setting that dominates every American industry.

But people don’t pursue a career in non-profits for the valor of having their own cubicle and unlimited sticky notes; it’s because of the affected segments of society that may not be getting enough help from the government. That is precisely the reason that non-profit employees enter the industry with an unrivaled enthusiasm and optimistic outlook. Unfortunately, some of us may fall victim to office-atrophy and forget why in the world we’re subjecting our eyes to prolonged staring contests with computer monitors (the computer typically wins, by the way).

I’d like to think that I’m too young and new to the field to fall victim to the office plague. But age isn’t the only thing that keeps me riled up, or a veteran disengaged with the true purpose of non-profits; it is the moments (or lack thereof) that we share with everyday people that keeps us coming to work with pep in our step or callous on our kneecaps from crawling to the desk. These moments, or what I would like to call ‘reminder moments,’ are so powerful that they can recapture you into the non-profit world for decades at a time.

Last month, I had one of those reminder moments when I visited Cameron Community Ministries Food Pantry here in Rochester. As a Hunger Advocate for Foodlink, one of the projects that I am currently working on is a compilation of testimonials and narratives from individuals and families who benefit from our foods that are served at one of our nearly 450 partner agencies. I plan on including some of the narratives in our newsletter, blog, and potentially, local commercials. Cameron seemed like an ideal place to start. After nearly 30 years of serving needy families, Cameron has established itself as a staple in the community.

When I showed up, there were people of all sizes, shapes, colors and ages waiting on a long line at the entrance. Some people were there with toddlers, some were married elderly couples, some were disabled and wheelchair bound, and others were middle aged with war veterans’ attire — goes to show the many faces of domestic hunger in our own backyard. But of all the different people on the soup line, there was one ordinary looking man who captured my attention. He saw me speaking with people about my project and patiently waited for me to approach him.

“I heard your spiel. Well, I’m probably who you’re looking for if you need a good story.”
The journalist inside of me said “perfect, this guy is going to give me golden quotes that will let the story write itself,” while the non-profit employee in me said “this is a perfect opportunity to see how someone ideally benefits from our services at the ground level.” But his story was far greater than what journalism and/or non-profits can grasp; it was something so powerful that it put a weigh on my heart and spirits.

“I’m 40 years-old in an 80 year-old body,” were the first words he used to describe himself. “My bones are deteriorating and doctors doubt if I’ll live much longer.” At 6”5’ and with a set of broad shoulders, he had a physical presence that was contradicted by an aura of defeat and a completely toothless grill. He told me that he always dreamed of being in the NFL, but his aspirations were squashed when he suffered from a serious knee injury while he was playing as a star center in high school. Ever since that day, his knees have gradually developed arthritis so intense that he has needed multiple recurring surgeries.

But the collapse of his NFL dreams are the least of his problems. The gentleman claims that he’s been in over 12 car accidents, some purposely suicide attempts after his painful divorce eight years ago. One of those accidents bruised his lungs and damaged his rib cage. His divorce enraged him so much that he nearly went to prison for attempting to murder his ex-wife and mother-in-law.

That morning was his first day on the soup line. “I’m here because I ran out of food,” he said. “What the hell do they expect me to do with disability and welfare checks? They’re quite measly. I can’t work because my body’s shot.” When I asked him if he was accepting Food Stamps/SNAP, he immediately responded “What, $200?” he laughed. “I go through that in coffee. And I do make a pretty damn good coffee by the way. That’s one thing I’m really proud of.”

After speaking with him for a good while, I almost didn’t want to go back to the office. I never met the man, but I was nervous about him going back to an empty home and an empty fridge. If my job is to help people like him, I’d much rather be out there with him.

But that’s when I realized that my reminder moment had everything to do with what I do from my cubicle. Though I may not be able to physically be with every person, I can help every person. If I ever felt lethargic at work, he certainly woke me up and reenergized me to give everything my all — from writing a grant to giving a PowerPoint presentation on hunger. I can only hope that I will run into him again someday and he’ll be smiling with a mouth full of teeth, a beautiful wife, and a kid sitting on daddy’s shoulders.

So my charge to all office employees is to get out of the cave and speak to one of your beneficiaries. It is their narratives that constantly reminds us why we subject ourselves to insulated office air and the constant sound of printers.